Sunday, July 29, 2007
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
New story on it's way
I have sent my latest story "Prison exposure" to my editor. Hopefully I will be able to post it soon. Just thought I would let you know.
Hugs Jen
Hugs Jen
Sunday, July 8, 2007
Why exhibitionist?
I am going to write the answer to a recent e-mail question here as the reply might have a general interest (at least amongst some of my readers). Basically the question was "when and how I realised I had exhibitionist tendencies".
Even back in my teenage days I was well aware of the reaction that my looks and body had on guys. Probably more that my girlfriends who was just laughing embarrassed when the guys looked at them. I on the other hand didn't laugh, I just enjoyed the looks.
I remember a school trip to Holland at about the age of 15 or 16, when the boys wanted to play strip poker. We were all drunk and the group was one of good friends, some of whom had been going out with each other for a while, so most of us accepted the challenge. However, as we got to the point of loosing crucial parts of clothing some dropped out, but a number of us kept going.
At one point we were down to only three guys and two girls still in the game while the others watched. When the second guy lost the last peace of clothing the spectators applauded and whistled. I was getting aroused, and even though I was only down to panties and t-shirt with no bra, I was worried that my wet crotch would be obvious. When the other girl lost her bra, that was the first time the group actually got to see a pair of naked breasts. She was terribly embarrassed and tried to cover herself as much as possible. I had already decided that when it became my turn I wasn't going to do that, but would just try to act naturally. However, when I in the next two rounds lost both the t-shirt and then the panties, both the guys grew huge erections. I found it difficult to keep the detached attitude I had planned. The atmosphere was totally changed. Electrified, the spectators breathless. No more catcalls. I think everybody thought maybe we had gone too far. I however, was just so aroused from the way the two guys so obviously had become excited when I dropped my clothes, and not a little proud that it had happened when I exposed my breasts and not when the other girl did.
One of guys felt shy and tried to hide his erection while the other one just kept looking at me. He was obviously aware that I was as excited as he was, even though it didn't show as prominently. But I just couldn't help positioning myself in a way where he could look at my glistering wet pussy while I tried to keep from staring too obviously at his blue throbbing penis head oozing with moisture. When the other girl lost her panties she dropped them in a rush and ran out of the room with an embarrassed girlish scream. We all woke from the trance, got our clothes on and tried to behave as if nothing had happened. But I was really very much aware how excited I had become from the looks of the other two guys, not to mention the rest of the group which had been looking at us, silently observing the display.
All that happened in my teenage days. Everything was wild then, and I didn't actually click on to the fact that I might be any different than other girls. I knew some were more shy that I was, but I just thought that was natural. But I couldn't help reliving the scene in my head. The thought that they had all seen me totally naked was both embarrassing the exciting. I had been with several guys already, and I had enjoyed the way they looked at me when we were making love, but I hadn't expected that it would get me so excited thinking about innocent bystanders seeing me naked.
That is a dilemma that has haunted me all my life. When I am excited I love exposing myself, but afterwards I keep wondering what goes through the head of people having seen me. Are they imagining my tits being naked again when they are talking to me? I have discussed that with a friend of ours who has been in several porn movies. She says it doesn't bother her at all. It is like two different worlds which are perfectly separated. That is also what my husband Poul says about her. Even though he has not only seen her naked but also in very intimate situations blown up on the screen, he says that picture doesn't appear in his mind when he is talking to her. I guess it is a bit like meeting your ex at a dinner party some year later. You can have a perfectly normal conversation without thinking about all the times you have had sex.
I guess the time I really understood my feelings as an exhibitionist came at a time when a group of people at my dad's office where I worked had an opportunity to see pictures of me naked. It was totally unintentional, believe it or not. I had had a six month fling with a guy from my dad's office and in his summerhouse on the Spanish island of Mallorca he had taken a series of pictures of me getting more and more undressed and finally adopting several very exposing postures by the pool. The pictures were the last ten or so of a film showing my boyfriend racing his boat. One of the other crew members, who also worked in the office, had wanted to see the pictures of the race. I had removed the ones of me from the pile, but hadn't thought of the negatives. The guy wanting a copy of the pictures had taken the film to be developed and not knowing anything differently had had the whole film developed
One day when I entered the cafeteria at the office I saw a number of the guys looking up at me, laughing and making lewd comments. As I approached I saw all the pictures of me laid out on the table, some even blown up to A4 size. I stopped dead in my tracks, everybody looking at me mentally projecting the images of my naked body onto the image of me standing frozen to the spot trying to figure out what to do next. I decided against making a scene, or trying to collect the pictures. The damage had already been done, and now it was a question of saving face. I just looked at them as if they were naughty small boys, shook my head and turned around leaving as gracefully as I could.
But in the hall the reality hit me. All these guys had now seen me naked, and they would be remembering those pictures every time they saw me. But what surprised me the most was my own feelings. I was just so aroused! For weeks after that the mental pictures of their eyes undressing me as I stood there in the cafeteria, would get my juices flowing and my knees going weak.
It was after that realisation that I started to play with exposing myself. My attitude to sex got more daring and experimental. To date the number of times I have exposed myself more or less obvious cannot be counted. But the two times that come to my mind when I think back to the first occurrences are these two. And thinking about them can still get me excited!
I hope that gives some kind of an answer to the question.
Hugs Jen
Even back in my teenage days I was well aware of the reaction that my looks and body had on guys. Probably more that my girlfriends who was just laughing embarrassed when the guys looked at them. I on the other hand didn't laugh, I just enjoyed the looks.
I remember a school trip to Holland at about the age of 15 or 16, when the boys wanted to play strip poker. We were all drunk and the group was one of good friends, some of whom had been going out with each other for a while, so most of us accepted the challenge. However, as we got to the point of loosing crucial parts of clothing some dropped out, but a number of us kept going.
At one point we were down to only three guys and two girls still in the game while the others watched. When the second guy lost the last peace of clothing the spectators applauded and whistled. I was getting aroused, and even though I was only down to panties and t-shirt with no bra, I was worried that my wet crotch would be obvious. When the other girl lost her bra, that was the first time the group actually got to see a pair of naked breasts. She was terribly embarrassed and tried to cover herself as much as possible. I had already decided that when it became my turn I wasn't going to do that, but would just try to act naturally. However, when I in the next two rounds lost both the t-shirt and then the panties, both the guys grew huge erections. I found it difficult to keep the detached attitude I had planned. The atmosphere was totally changed. Electrified, the spectators breathless. No more catcalls. I think everybody thought maybe we had gone too far. I however, was just so aroused from the way the two guys so obviously had become excited when I dropped my clothes, and not a little proud that it had happened when I exposed my breasts and not when the other girl did.
One of guys felt shy and tried to hide his erection while the other one just kept looking at me. He was obviously aware that I was as excited as he was, even though it didn't show as prominently. But I just couldn't help positioning myself in a way where he could look at my glistering wet pussy while I tried to keep from staring too obviously at his blue throbbing penis head oozing with moisture. When the other girl lost her panties she dropped them in a rush and ran out of the room with an embarrassed girlish scream. We all woke from the trance, got our clothes on and tried to behave as if nothing had happened. But I was really very much aware how excited I had become from the looks of the other two guys, not to mention the rest of the group which had been looking at us, silently observing the display.
All that happened in my teenage days. Everything was wild then, and I didn't actually click on to the fact that I might be any different than other girls. I knew some were more shy that I was, but I just thought that was natural. But I couldn't help reliving the scene in my head. The thought that they had all seen me totally naked was both embarrassing the exciting. I had been with several guys already, and I had enjoyed the way they looked at me when we were making love, but I hadn't expected that it would get me so excited thinking about innocent bystanders seeing me naked.
That is a dilemma that has haunted me all my life. When I am excited I love exposing myself, but afterwards I keep wondering what goes through the head of people having seen me. Are they imagining my tits being naked again when they are talking to me? I have discussed that with a friend of ours who has been in several porn movies. She says it doesn't bother her at all. It is like two different worlds which are perfectly separated. That is also what my husband Poul says about her. Even though he has not only seen her naked but also in very intimate situations blown up on the screen, he says that picture doesn't appear in his mind when he is talking to her. I guess it is a bit like meeting your ex at a dinner party some year later. You can have a perfectly normal conversation without thinking about all the times you have had sex.
I guess the time I really understood my feelings as an exhibitionist came at a time when a group of people at my dad's office where I worked had an opportunity to see pictures of me naked. It was totally unintentional, believe it or not. I had had a six month fling with a guy from my dad's office and in his summerhouse on the Spanish island of Mallorca he had taken a series of pictures of me getting more and more undressed and finally adopting several very exposing postures by the pool. The pictures were the last ten or so of a film showing my boyfriend racing his boat. One of the other crew members, who also worked in the office, had wanted to see the pictures of the race. I had removed the ones of me from the pile, but hadn't thought of the negatives. The guy wanting a copy of the pictures had taken the film to be developed and not knowing anything differently had had the whole film developed
One day when I entered the cafeteria at the office I saw a number of the guys looking up at me, laughing and making lewd comments. As I approached I saw all the pictures of me laid out on the table, some even blown up to A4 size. I stopped dead in my tracks, everybody looking at me mentally projecting the images of my naked body onto the image of me standing frozen to the spot trying to figure out what to do next. I decided against making a scene, or trying to collect the pictures. The damage had already been done, and now it was a question of saving face. I just looked at them as if they were naughty small boys, shook my head and turned around leaving as gracefully as I could.
But in the hall the reality hit me. All these guys had now seen me naked, and they would be remembering those pictures every time they saw me. But what surprised me the most was my own feelings. I was just so aroused! For weeks after that the mental pictures of their eyes undressing me as I stood there in the cafeteria, would get my juices flowing and my knees going weak.
It was after that realisation that I started to play with exposing myself. My attitude to sex got more daring and experimental. To date the number of times I have exposed myself more or less obvious cannot be counted. But the two times that come to my mind when I think back to the first occurrences are these two. And thinking about them can still get me excited!
I hope that gives some kind of an answer to the question.
Hugs Jen
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